PewDiePie Rap Roast - Dan Bull

I feel a little bad dissing a healthy, wholesome Christian channel

It’s gonna hit a nerve like a dentist drill just split enamel

But if you listen out, you’ll hear some sounds that I’ll be saying

That’ll get inside your brain and you’ll never feel quite the same

Now, for the benefit of kids to whom I’ve not been introduced

I’m Dan Bull, a man who’ll make you think but using cringey tunes

It’s like an interview except that I rip into you

With rhymes and lyrics that’ll get inside and sting like Vindaloo

But I’m just dissing you to get the views, Mr. Pewds

Unlike Onision, who is just rude, I can resist a feud

I pick and choose my victims like you pick your whiskey, dude

Just get a whiff of those big digits and I hit the booze

I’m getting sick and woozy sniffing the Hibiki fumes

Just give us a minute, consider this an interlude

While I nick your format and I twist it to «Get pissed?

You lose!»

So, if you do get pissed at this dispute

I guess you missed the truth

It’s just a new and different route for me to redistribute

My criticism of big issues by which we’re each affected too

These days it hits the YouTube before it hits the news

That’s why they’re swift to try to get a libel hit on you

So, I just sit amused at this dispute for which a truce

Is just as blooming likely as if finding that they print the truth

You dream of receiving a teabagging from G-Dragon

But I don’t think he’ll go for a skinny Swedish Steve Bannon

I’d tell you to delete your channel but I’d be here all night

Hold tight, you made a keyboard macro to be alt-right

Oh my, did I just push your buttons?

You’re the touchy type

You could be right aligned, centre, left but you’re not justified

If I could underline the stuff that I’m disgusted by

You’d just see stripes across the writing

Like a crusty white piece of tiger bread

I’d like to peek inside your head

So, I could see just why you said the things

That people like to get offended by

Sometimes it seems just like they really like to be upset

But on the other side, there could be times that we forget

If you breathe a breath and move your lips about in certain shapes

It makes it tricky to discern if you’re dispersing hate

I personally believe that you’re a decent person, great

So, don’t feed your haters with an easy way to circulate beliefs

That you’re in league with a certain recent German state

It’s like a skirmish in the street, it’s not even worth it, mate

You got the Wall Street Journal hating

They should give you some credit

You made a way to monetise from

Browsing your own Sub-Reddit

Yeah, let the fans make the content and you just get it

Ad lib over the top of it, you barely even need to edit

Now this sounds callous, but well, I’m just putting it out there

You used to have your art in galleries and now you sell chairs

Your network dropped you, your net worth dropped, you

Could be better off trying to get work in a shop, you

Might as well just drop vlogs, go back to selling hot dogs

And speaking of hot dogs, they’re absolutely not pugs

Actually, I feel bad for saying that, I’ll leave them out of it

Now 'cause it isn’t your pets' fault their daddy smells of fish

Anyone can set a Yeti on a desk and shout at it

Come to think about it, it’s the thing I’m doing now, flip

Picking controversial topics out to get the mouse clicks

Except if I was you now, I’d take the mick of Auschwitz

How many million Jews died, Pewds?

About six?

I guess that’s insignificant to your subscriber count, Felix

If anyone wants to break their contract with Maker Studios

PewDie knows a new solution: Just make a stupid joke

But wait a blooming moment, Maker Studios are owned by Disney

The very same Disney that made this scene

That’s still available for kids of any age to see

Hmm, I guess it’s different when they’re Asian clichés

It’s double standards plus it’s underhanded business practice

YouTube will never give a slapped wrist over Disney’s tactics

They’re bringing too many views from useful demographics

While declaring bans on other channels, it’s undemocratic

You’ll never crack the algorithm, it’s too enigmatic

To reach your own subscribers now, you’d better be telepathic

So, I guess we’ll never know but on a level though

I’m empathetic for the other fellows signed to Revelmode

You took them on your ship then left them on an Archipelago

About as relevant as Leafy saying «swag» and «hella dope»

You’re breaking YouTube’s safety policy, be careful bro

No I ent, I’m just taking the P, look;

Kwebbelko

Take the letters of PewDiePie and turn them to an anagram:

«I wipe deep,» is there somethin' that you wanna tell me, man?

You’ve gone from looking like a cheap G-Dragon rip off

To someone the police’d need to speak to, they received a tip off

I see your beard growing, so excuse me for assuming

But a primary sign of depression is

Neglecting your personal grooming

Fumbling through the kitchen, trying to stick together crap meals

Drinking whiskey on your own at home, I know how that feels

I understand, man, it’s a cry for help

These are deep feelings each and every guy has felt

I say you’re suffering in silence, it isn’t that obsurd

You were in the Ricegum diss track and didn’t rap a word