Jobs I Had Before I Got Rich & Famous - Walter Martin

Mowing lawns saving up for a guitar

when I was fifteen and long and lean

and just like that grass, boy I was green

delivering roses in Washington D.C.

going off to college so I had to save up

but delivering roses really sucks

sweating all summer in a slimy tux

but at least I made a couple bucks

freshman in college I was delivering pizza

but to deliver one pie was a half an hour round trip

and college kids, man they don’t tip

so I quit and it was their loss

‘cause i was the only driver not stealing from the boss

and siphoning gas from students cars

Metropolitan Museum at the telephone switchboard

when a caller would ask for Phillip de Montebello

I’d transfer them to my apartment

where an unsuspecting fellow,

my roommate Stewart, would be sound asleep

he’d answer the calls when he heard the beep

pretty quick they’d realize he wasn’t Phillip

information counter at the Cloisters Museum

and one day Billy Joel walks in

I take a long long look at him

a dignified old music man

and that’s when I devised my plan

and that little plan has brought me here

where the spotlight shines and the people all cheer

and the pretty girls flock from far and near

to touch my hand and hear my song

and buy my t-shirts and sing along

goddamn this sure beats moving lawns