The Acid Song - Loudon Wainwright III

I had not taken acid for twelve years

But one night last summer I did

I was adrift in a bar room

Acting like a jerk and a kid

I knew we were asking for trouble

Trouble was what we would get

Five of us dropped in the girls' room

Psychedelicized insane quintet

Well that bathroom got crowded in no time

Our minds were all blown in one flash

Everyone in there got ugly

We exited out of there fast

Back in the bar we were happy

No problem, feel great

Back in the bar we were fine

Till Johnny turned into a Nazi

And Mary threw up all her wine

Well in no time we all were ejected

Soon we were out on the street

The sidewalk began to perspire

We had glass and dog shit at our feet

We went over to Mary’s apartment

To listen to the Grateful Dead

On the way there we lost Johnny

He had opted for Bellevue instead

Boy I’m really glad you talked me into doing this…

Really having a ball

Yeah, yeah I know, I know, I know that my hair’s on fire

Your face is melting

Did you know that?

I don’t know where the Ravi Shankar tape is

Well I had to get out of that city

Bobby was bringing me down

Me and my darling young Susie

Said so long and drove out of town

Driving on acid is easy

Driving on acid’s a breeze

Just keep the car on the highway

Don’t laugh and don’t fart and don’t sneeze

Oh we got to my house in the country

Yeah, the country, I like this

The trees were all throbbing and green

Susie was sure she had cancer

I was sure I was James Dean

We went down the lake to go swimming

Down to the lake for a swim

Susie said, «water cures cancer»

I asked her to please call me Jim

Yes acid is usually dangerous

The mild-mannered can quickly turn mean

LSD can surely derange us

Unless you possess Thorazine

So, the next time you wanna go out there

When you feel like feeding your head

Think twice before dropping acid

Hold out for mushrooms instead!