Housework - Loudon Wainwright III

I’ve been waiting for you to come through that door, dear

Your whereabouts tonight I do not know

The house is nice and clean, the wineglasses they gleam

The candles on the table cast their glow

I finished cooking dinner an hour ago

I’ve been listening for the sound of your step, darling

Hoping that I hear it on the stair

You’ve been gone all day, I hate when you’re away

Don’t worry though, I’ve hoovered everywhere

Just to prove to you I really

I’ve been washing dishes all the live long day

I’ve been making wishes;

«You'll come home and stay»

Don’t worry, sweetheart, I did all the shopping

While I was out I dropped off your blouse

I paid all the bills and I picked up your pills

Mustn’t grumble, no I shouldn’t grouse

Your heart’s here though you’re nowhere near this house

I’ve been wondering when you’ll come home, baby

I’m paranoid you’re with another guy

You said I was your man, the bathroom’s spick and span

I even cleaned the mirror, that’s no lie

As I did a tear came to my

I’ve been washing dishes all the live long day

I’ve been making wishes;

«You'll come home and stay»

I pray you haven’t gone and left me, bum fluff

If you did, I don’t know what I’d do

Herein lies the rub, I even did the tub

You treat me like a dog, a worn out shoe

I got down on all fours, dear, just for

(I've been washing dishes)