Bottom Drawer - St. South

There were dust shells in the light pockets

There were film trailers playing in my wallet

Folded movie tickets pressed behind my drivers license

Nostalgia spilled across my floor

So I ran my fingers along the skirting boards

Tried to stop it from spilling more

Tried to stop me from riding it out the door

And the dust it grew, and garnered, and forever made it harder

To let you look me in the eyes

On the days where I didn’t want to be alive

There are rattlesnakes in the bottom drawer

Where my parents kept the spare batteries and more

The coming out letter I sent too late

Somewhere beneath the measuring tape

I worked so hard to make myself tall

Tried to balance on the chairs my mother cut the legs off

I propped myself up with a daydream crutch

Of being a strong boy and making my own lunch

Of grabbing hands and asking them to dance

Of hoping for a Summer romance

And the dust it grew, and garnered, and forever made it harder

To let you look me in the eye on the days where I didn’t want to be alive