Shoppers' Paradise - Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine

Ground floor Shoppers' Paradise

Habit-dashery, needles, spoons and knives

Knuckle-dusters, glass jaws and wooden hearts

Spend your money girls on sprays and lipsticks

Tested on bunnies, girls, strays and misfits

Ozone friendly rape alarms

For those blinding dates

Another summer of hate

It’s the top shop for the tired and rundown

Going up for the final comedown

First and second floors, third and fourth world wars

We’ve got a free pair of flares

With every hip replacement

Just take the stairs to the bargin basement

Babies bottles full of the milk of human kindnestle

CHORUS

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls

The big shop is open it’s a wonderful world

Top floor Shoppers' Paradise

We’ve got a drunk Father Christmas and the Antichrist

We’ve got nothing of value so there’s no V.A.T.

We’re going S.H.O.P.P.I.N.G.

We take Visa, Access, American Express

Patched-up, hand-me-down, second to next best

Clothes for all ages, mothers and babies

CHORUS

Going down for all the things you missed

All the love, peace and happiness that don’T exist

We’ve got enpsychopaedias we’ve got pic 'n' fix

A government freezer full of benefits

A children’s assortment we’re bigger than Hamley’s

We’ve got Cabbage Patch orphans from Sylvanian Families

Carpets, linoleum, holy petroleum,

Chemi-kaze killers, little Hitlers and Napoleons

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls

The big shop is open and the world

Is wonderful