Ozzie Girl - R Plus

So, um, actually I was in love with this fella’s best friend

He was way more good looking and um, anyway

He fancied my best friends, that kinda screwed things up for me

But I thought, you know, if I get together with the best mate

I get to hang out with the guy I really like

So I did, you know?

Um, but I was a virgin

And he was not, that’s true

He was also, I think a drug addict already

But um, anyway, so we hung out as a foursome a lot

He was a terrible kisser

And the other guy looked like a really good kisser

I used to watch the others kissing and it was like hot, really hot

Anyway, finally, we go to this party

And my sister is dating this guy I’m seeing’s brother, right

So they go off for a wander in the fields

And I know what they’re going to do

And then the guy that I’m seeing says

«Do you wanna go for a walk?»

And I’m like, oh, shit

But I went, «Okay, sure,"and he was leaving that night to go to the airport

So I thought, you know what can go wrong?

If it does go wrong, he’s leaving so you know

If he abducts me, he can only abduct me for like an hour

So then, we go for a walk

And uh, we lie down in this field and this full moon, so romantic

Except it’s not romantic 'cause they’re fucking prickles all over my ass

And like in my head and my neck

And he’s like dry humping me

But I just go with it, you know?

Then he’s like getting his donger out

And putting on a you know what

And then he goes

«Guide me»

And I’m like, no