You Always Win - Protomartyr, Kelley Deal

The moon is a former friend who no longer lights the way

Through an ever thickening lens I see only frightening things

That’s if I see them at all against the yellow wall

You win again

Up the four flights of stairs

On the landing a child’s chair

I suppose we can talk of that

The future feels like the past

I’ve lost all my keys

The lock has defeated me

You win again

The rectified has let me down

It churns my guts and busts my skull

I await the decade of

Fortified pills and milky tea

Restful days with polite company

Pull that sheet right over me

You win again

Clean mind or clean body, choose one or the other

Having both seems over indulgent

You say normal people live this way

They learned it from an early age

It all seems so strange

So strange

I mumble — you win again

I go grey — you win again

I grow weak — you win again

I lose my way — you win again

You win again

You always win

You always win

It’s a game I must play

It’s what I must do

So deal me in

Deal me in