Bored of Education - Propaganda

Dear Bored of Education

So are we, huh, so are we

At no point in the lives that we actually live do we sit in rows and listen to

pontifications

At no point did momma pass written exams out on how to wash the dishes, no

She pulled the stool up next to her, at the sink, handed us a dishrag, like

«Watch how mommy does it, now you try.»

Learning by doing, such a crazy idea, it might work

Them stools felt like a magical ladders into an alternate universe

Into the grown-up world

Informational portholes, wormholes, into other places

Where kids were equals, being made privy to information only those with

Driver’s licenses and facial hair had

Who knew we were learning, no clue Pops was teaching us time management

And budgeting, miniature project co-ordinators

He said, «Imma show you how to do these chores.

And if they’re done when I get

home

Then that allowance is yours.

Maybe some ice cream’s involved too.»

Remember when we were in kindergarten, and you had to learn about worms, yeah,

you went outside

And you played with worms, what a novel idea!

Dear Bored of Education!, huh, so are we

Dear Bored of Education, all I’ve learned from your system is the fact that

it’s just the system

That you set up.

And if I just repeat what you just said, in Jane Schaffer

method

Then I passed, right?

You’re just testing my ability to regurgitate

And if your best instructors are miserable, I’m pretty sure it’s not the kids'

fault

This pain I know first hand, the grand learning moments, the innovative lesson

plans

That causes eyes to sparkle as if them students have just caught rides on

shooting stars

These lessons have wings, only to get clipped, to fit, into the Low-Res JPEG.

you call

«The State Standards.»

Why do you insist this is still the industrial age?

My child is not a widget.

And a school should not be an assembly line.

Making my daughter’s

Diploma equivalent to an inspected by 2235 stamp

Dear Bored of Education, so are we

Dear Bored of Education, there’s not a Scantron on the planet that can measure

inspiration

This is what our teachers pass on that matters

But you’d rather them do a jig to the tune of an AYP score

As to avoid losing WASC right?

NCLB got us shockin' and jivin', but you can’t measure a kid inviting their

Teacher to a Quincenera or a soccer game, or waiting rooms at free clinics

I can name ten kids off hand who would still be in handcuffs if it wasn’t for

Mr. Singer

Nick Luvanno runs his own design firm.

And he failed the exit exams twice.

FAILED

Dear Board of Education, I mean, can we not Google when the Magna Carta was

signed?

If your brightest stars are always dim, something must be wrong with your

glasses

If every place on your body that you touch hurts, then your fingers must be

broken

You are PhD.'s, you have five suffixes at the end of your names,

you’re the people that know

A lot, how come you’re not smart enough to know that you don’t know what you

don’t know?

Did anyone ever suggest, that maybe, we should test the test?

Dear Bored of Education, my dear Bored of Education, so are we

So are we