At Your Inconvenience - Professor Green

I’m back

Like I never left

I’m here at your in-convenience

I’m back

Like I never left

I’m here at your in-convenience

(So Steve, Steve. Where did you grow up?

Upper Clapton, Hackney

(How old were you when you first started rapping?)

I was 18

(Who are your major influences?)

Are you serious?

Your mum

I ain’t answering anymore of your questions

You know what?

I have a question

Whose idea was it to get in the charts

By rhyming over Hungarian dance mu-sic?

And why would I make dance mu-sic

When I can’t dance to it?

I’m the anecdote to that shit

Bringing back this rap shit

Soon as I’m done calling this bulimic a fat bitch

I’ll be saving the day and renegade with a dog playing fetch

Watching him chase a grenade (pow)

Maybe I should play the same game with Bruno

If I ever again get mistaken for a Cluedo character

I’m gonna have to unleash some amateur judo

I just took a shit and now I can’t find any loo roll

Two flows for everyone that you got, too hot, I do squat

Diddily and do more than you do when you do lots, do lots

Do women do for me what they do not do for you?

Maybe it’s got something to do with my new watch

(I'm back) I’m back

(Like I never left) like I never left

(I'm here at your) I’m here at your

(In-convenience) in-convenience

(I'm back) I’m back

(Like I never left) like I never left

(I'm here at your) I’m here at your

(In-convenience) in-convenience

I have a question

Why would I beat around the bush or take the scenic route?

When I’m a meanie born to instigate fumes

I’m the morning, midday and evening news

And I started a trend, Mike got his teeth fixed too (Mike Skinner)

If you’re wondering where I’ve been at, kicked back with a six-pack

Of Beck’s on a bench, sunbathing in a hijab

Give me a Tic-Tac, I just had a pack of Nik Naks

Thanks now I’ll turn you into a kebab with my pick-axe

Mish, mash, mosh pit, whenever I drop shit it’s hot shit

I just won a race with an ostrich

Obnoxious, preposterous, looney, a damn nutter

If I ever see Rooney anywhere near my grandmother (ah!)

I live life without an ounce of logic

I like my wrist so much I spent a house deposit on it

Vomit and then I drink more wine

Then I broke a bowl and hope the hospital gives me morphine

How do you spend your time?

I don’t have a question, nope

When it comes to competition I’m burying them

Better to bury them then have them getting lairy again

They want it with me like they want it with malaria

Like Wayne Bridge wants to be John Terry’d again

I developed an obsession with Caroline Flack

I wouldn’t mind having a go on Caroline’s-

Actually I promise to never be so vulgar

To never mention putting my cobra

Inside of Anna Kournikova

I swear

I think I’ve got it out of my system now

(You sure?)

I am once again ready to answer questions

(Good, cause there’s so much I’ve been wanting to ask you)

About 8 inches

(What?)