Lay Your Head Down - Mary Lambert

Lay your head down

Lay your head down

Lay your head down on me

What is the state of your heart?

Is it concave?

Are you awake?

Sometimes when I cry

I start to cry harder simply because I am crying

Or because I know that in the world

Somewhere there are little girls that are wearing tutus

And singing Christmas songs

Or because there are actual Shar Pei puppies that look like rolled up towels

Or because on the internet, you can find pictures of pigs in rain boots

You can find anything on the internet

That is so cool

Or I cry because Sarah McLaughlin comes onto my TV

And sings to animals that don’t have homes (Fuck you Sarah McLaughlin)

(Just kidding, I love you Sarah McLaughlin)

Sometimes I cry when cheese is really good

Or when I’ve cut onions (but that’s just human)

I cry when there is no end and I cry because there is an end

And I cry because you love me so well

And I cry because I gave my love to other people before you

And I cry because I used to cry alone because I wanted to die

I cry because the sunset is so beautiful on the Connecticut river

I cry because I am scared I am losing my mind

I cry because I’m on meds or because I forgot my meds or I’m crying for the

fact I’m crying because I forgot my meds and does this actually mean I am

myself?

And I am crying because maybe I am myself

And that doesn’t feel like enough

Lay your head down

Lay your head down

Lay your head down on me

What is the state of your heart?

Is it concave?

Are you awake?

I cry because sometimes my only power feels like tweeting a hashtag,

because that feels so vapid and useless

Or I cry because I am human and I’m connected and there is immense sadness in

the world

I cry because humanity is frightening

Because one person consumed with self-hatred and armed with one gun can kill an

entire room of people

I cry because shame propels so many of us

I cry because so many people forget how important it is to cry or are made to

feel weak when they do

I cry because I want to close my eyes

I cry because I can’t

And I cry because there is also good

There’s also chocolate cake and love and Harry Potter

And the brilliant gasps of magic of holding a hand

And hammocks

I love hammocks!

I cry because it is late in the Summer and all the fireflies are winking at me

and the moon is out and it wants nothing from me

I cry because my heart used to be an atlas with all the continents cut out

I cry because I am full now and sure and say yes when I mean yes,

and no when I mean no and can love you with all of my breath

I cry because I am so well

Because I live so well

And how could one person possibly to be so fortunate to live with all of this

light

Lay your head down

Lay your head down

Lay your head down on me

Lay your head down

Lay your head down

Lay your head down on me

What is the state of your heart?

Is it concave?

Are you awake?

Stay awake

Stay awake

Stay awake