If You're so Smart, How Come You Ain't Rich? - Louis Jordan & His Tympany Five

You' braggin all about the things you can do

Every time you make a pitch

If you’re so smart,

How come you ain’t rich?

You claim to have picked every horse that won

'Cause you know just which is which

Yes, if you’re so smart,

Tell me, how come you ain’t rich?

Henry built the Ford and made his pile

Woolworth used his five and ten

Rockerfeller’s wealth came from Standard Oil

And Waterman’s came from a pen

You claim it all came from consultin' you

Isn’t that a brand new switch?

If you’re so smart,

How come you ain’t rich?

Mention work and you go berserk

'Cause you hate to do a stitch

If you’re so smart,

How come you ain’t rich?

You’re out for a ride on the road to fame

Yet you wind up in a ditch

Mmm-hmm — if you’re so smart,

Tell me, how come you ain’t rich?

Hershey started with a chocolate bar

Wrigley with a stick of gum

Planters took his peanuts and travelled far

Now tell me — what’you doin', chum?

I' been hearin' all about all your big ideas

Since you started.

What’s the hitch?

You never made ten dollars yet

You say you can balance the national debt

If you’re so smart,

How come you ain’t rich?