Table For One - Liz Phair

I’m walking down in the basement

I’m leaning on the washing machine

I’m reaching back through a hole in the wall’s insulation

I’m pulling out a bottle of vodka

Replacing that with a pint of Jim Bean

I’m lying down on the floor until I feel better

It’s morning and I pour myself coffee

I drink it til the kitchen stops shaking

I’m backing out of the driveway

And into creation

And the loving spirit that follows me Watching helplessly, will always forgive me Oh, I want to die alone

With my sympathy beside me I want to bring down all those demons who drank with me Feasting bleed through me On my desperation

I hide all the bottles in places

They find and confront me with pain in their eyes

And I promise that I’ll make some changes

But reaching back it occurs to me There will always be some kind of crisis for me Oh, I want to die alone

With my sympathy beside me I want to bring back all those moments they stole from me In my reverie

Darkening days end

Oh, I want to die alone

With my memories inside me I want to live that life

When I could say people had faith in me

I still see that guy in my memory

Oh, I want to die alone

With my sympathy beside me I want to bring down all those people who drank with me Watching happily

My humiliation