Father - Hobo Johnson

My dad taught me 'bout

The story 'bout the birds and the bees

When the bees turn into wasps and take half of everything

He sounded sure, that a bird doesn’t need a full nest

But a bed for our bird heads to rest

He told me son you’ll never dunk (WHAT?)

Its family tradition basketball is not for us

Our legs just aren’t that springy

My great-great-uncle almost did but he didn’t

He told me son beware, of the monsters

That roam the depths of your head

Sometimes they’ll make you real sad or

Or real, real mad, or real, real jealous and

That’s real, real bad, boy breathe

Nicotine until you fall asleep like all of our family

Breathe!

Nicotine until you fall asleep

Like, all of our family, like all of our family

I’m the new Will Smith, I’m

I’m, Will Smith mixed with Michael Cera

I’m Will Smith, Michael Cera

Kevin Spacey, Michael Cera man

My father’s married to a shape-shifting monster

Who can sometimes take the form

Of a really really really nice woman

And although it seems super fucking frightening

Sometimes this scary monster makes

A really really great vanilla pudding, he has courage

But sometimes your courage isn’t quite the kryptonite

As the monster runs rampant through the house

Sometimes your courage makes you feel strong

But it seems as if the monster eats your muscles all along

Fucking pickin' out your self-respect right out its scary teeth

Her breath smells like pride of self

And other men she used to meet

And the monster doesn’t sleep

It just schemes and fiends

On the next tasty meal it gets to eat

It gets to eat

It gets to eat

I’m the new Will Smith

I’m mixed with Kevin Spacey

I’m the new Will Smith

Kevin Spacey

Michael Cera, man

Oh

(What the fuck?) (oh)

(W-w-what the fuck?) (oh)

What the fuck?

Oh