There Is a Fracture - Henrik Widegren

The orthopedist said: There is a fracture.

I have to operate

The anaesthetist said: Great.

Can you please explicate?

The orthopaedist said: There is a fracture.

I have to operate

The anaesthetist said: I see, you need an operation

But if I’m gonna do it.

I need some more information

The orthopaedist said: It’s a fracture with a rotation

The anaesthetist said: Ok, whose fracture is it?

A he or a she?

A heavyweight or a kleine?

The orthopaedist said: Whose fracture?

Of course it’s mine!

The anaesthetist said: But whom does the fracture belong to?

Young or old?

Any other lesions known?

The orthopaedist said: The fracture belongs to a bone!

The anaesthetist said: And who belongs to the bone?

The orthopaedist said: I get it.

She’s healthy.

Let’s see:

Diabetes, COPD and she’s 93

The anaesthetist said: Thank you!

Anything else?

The orthopaedist said: Well, she’s laid three days in the woods

So she is very fasted.

Isn’t that good?

The anaesthetist said: Anything about her heart?

The orthopaedist said: Oh yes, I have her ECG

And she has, let’s see: Ventricular asystole

The anaesthetist took a benzo and said: Ok

Her heart, «the blood pump», it’s stopped its beating

The orthopaedist said: Oh, but then there will be less bleeding?

The anaesthetist said: The best is: We need no intubation

Cause your lady’s breath is on an everlasting vacation

The orthopaedist was thinking of fracture stabilization

The anaesthetist said: She’ll go to post mortem examination

And then she’s off to funeral and cremation

The orthopaedist said: I’ll join her!

She needs an operation!

She needs an operation!

Yes, I need an operation!