I, Trog -

Girlfriend’s said that she no longer likes me

Reckon I know why she thinks this way

It’s ‘cos I’m a Trog

And I’ve got mad sideys

And my gait is strange

So they say

Some blokes don’t neatly stencil their flight case

And some blokes don’t take apart valve amps for fun

But when you’re a Trog and you’ve got mad sideys

And your gait is strange

So they say

And when I swear it’s in a mellow way

Swiss Army knife and every shade of Humbrol

To Point of Ayr I like to get away

And in my dreams I take a beautiful girl

Got my weed and I’ve got my Sven Hassel

Omni stacked tenfold under the bed

In my rugby shirt, signed by Justin Hayward

I will rule the world

Playing Risk

I was born with a twelve string acoustic in my mouth

Midwife fixed springs to the soles of my feet

And now I’m a Trog and I’ve got mad sideys

And my gait is strange

So they say

And when I swear it’s in a mellow way

Swiss Army knife and every shade of Humbrol

To Point of Ayr I like to get away

And in my dreams I take a beautiful girl