Jiggle The Handle - Gwar

Coming to feed on the shit from your bodies

Your turds have more power than mere human feces

Let’s use its great power to recover the pieces

Hey!

Hey, jackass!

Yeah, you!

You got to love me so good, baby!

Yeah, yeah you can depend on me

Depending on if my water’s on

If my pipe’s unglogged

Ahhh if you’re water-logged

Baby, I am the hole

I am your toilet bowl

I’ll suck your soul, baby

Just pay… just pay my shitty toll!

Ahhhh…

Coated in shit, it gives all you desire

Mystical doorway, swirling in mire

We’ll use the plunger if blockage won’t budge

It’s a door through the Plane of Fudge

So many times I have found you

Still I always piss on the ground

Now I know that I can use you

I’m gonna stop fuckin' around

If you need shit, baby, I got shit

On that, you can depend

I’ll pump your stump, you fucking hump

My crappy, crap-caked friend

The Portal Potty, a gift from the gods

Let us pay it tribute and bury our wads

I think we know what it’s all about

Jiggle the handle, watch something jump out

I am a woman and I have my needs

You can never really know just when I’ll start to bleed

You need my egg, I need your seed

But pray at the altar

The toilet must feed!

Yeah, I’ll bring ya some suckers for a killing spree

Just keep that fucking tampon away from me, baby

Take in this world, it’s so beautiful

Filthy humans, you’re all so full of it

That which you can’t stand, you can’t understand

Speak the mystic words

And bring forth a turd

You turn around into it

And turn over to me

Cross the river, leave the abyss

Give the seat of the toilet a kiss

Each virgin sacrifice speaks these magic words

Well, Jiggle the handle, and call forth a turd

Yeah!

Here it comes, baby

I’m dropping my load

I ain’t just on it, I am the commode!

Ahhh!

The power of the toilet must never be abused

He must be plunged, he must be sponged, or carnage could ensue

If a dead sheep was to clog him, who knows what could arrive

Maybe it’ll bring the Master, wouldn’t that be a surprise?