On Hold - Chillinit

I’ma burn blunts till this pain go

I’m on a hunt for a rainbow

But there ain’t no pot of gold

Seeing me end with my brains blown

I’ma get money, count peso

So do as I say so

I still got my ex on hold

Yeah, yeah

That’s how you do me?

Like, go and spit on my face

Heartbroken, every single mistake

I can’t focus, like I’m livin' ashamed and livin' in pain

I think of the decisions we made, they still move me

Could’ve died together and ride together

Alive when we lied together

My mind slide in th night for a Kylie Jenner

I on-time Jeff, I died, your life is better

So I’d be out your pic, the frame is still movin'

Ounce of the shh, I blaze and stay stupid

Bounce on my shh, bitch, I make music

Inspire my mind, I write to make movies

But shit, I deny and lie and chase groupies

And sluts that are down to fuck, then blaze doobies

You know, the ones with buns and fake booties

That screamin' they 'bout to cum when they do me

Yeah, me and them went to war a lot

It’s probably why she wanna talk a lot

Wanna fight me, then fuck me, punch me, then love me

And somehow, she’s the one that calls the cops and plays victim

No wonder I stay distant

I could tell now we’re all grown up

I could tell she was bruised within from losin' him

I choose to see that she was all closed up

When you lost our son, you lost the sun

Feeling like it’s my fault you lost your love

And yeah, I’m feeling like it’s my fault you lost your trust

Now I’m drowning in lots of drugs, it’s not worth it

Yeah, I heard you got a man on your wish list

You’re about to start a business

I got your letters back in Christmas

I kept a drawer with the memories and pictures

Yeah, shit, girl, I used to get high with your sisters

They was like a fam to me

Showed me what a man could be, a fam could be

Ah, please shut the fuck up, Chill

Yeah, sometimes I was stalking that

Check your 'Gram, have a scan, where the stories at?

Let me say, every time that I called you back

You ignored all the calls, I’ll applaud the fact

But shit, girl, I used to get high with your sisters

They was like a fam to me

They showed me what a man could be

Ah, fuck, that’s twice now, shut the fuck up, Chill

Yeah, sometimes I was stalking that

Check your 'Gram, have a scan, where the stories at?

Let me say, every time that I’ve called you back

And you ignored all these calls, I’ll applaud the fact

'Cause that’s what I’d do, I deserve that

Let’s get high, boo, baby, burn that

Fuck good one last time, ah please, never mind

And pretend you never heard that

Fuck yeah, girl, now I’m stressing, where this herb at?

Shit, I just burned through the third pack all in one week

Now I gotta do a chorus before I bring the verse back

Yeah, I better bring the verse back

I’ma burn blunts till this pain go

I’m on a hunt for a rainbow

But there ain’t no pot of gold

Seeing me end with my brains blown

I’ma get money, count peso

So do as I say so

I still got my ex on hold

Yeah, yeah

Hey Mum, remember when you had triplets

And we only got twins?

Sometimes I wish he had’ve survived

And be apart of a life that we all gon' live but

I guess that we all got things that

We locked away to block the pain

I had the devil in my ear, got a lot to say

But calm down, Chill, rock on the J and call your mum back

Ahh, I’m alone and smoke vivid

Thinkin' 'bout the night that you told me to go get it

I only see my brothers a bunch, every few months

They must hate they’re alone, I know I should go visit

But I’m out on the road with smokin' dope women

Gettin' twenty-five racks to show, then blow Swishes

Ten racks on clothes, the bros live it

Now I got the pressure and stress that goes with it

Nah, fuck that, I’m thinkin', fuck this whole image

They told me to never meet your idols

In the end, your friends become rivals

«Keep your enemies close» becomes vital

Everything that I touch became viral

But one of these cunts just get violent

In the end, I laugh and just smile, like «Pfft»

If you wanna jump me, you jump me, you won’t, though

We don’t really want no smoke, bro

But I ain’t hiding, shh be the postcode

A third eye open like a GoPro

Had him on a string like a yo-yo

But I remember when Olga passed

I never got to visit and that broke my heart

So Ma, please know, if I die from this life every night

That’s my fault, I chose this path that I chose

I deal with emotions hard

And that’s probably why I swallow these drugs

And bottle it up and count on my brotherly love

To do this shit for my brothers above, and that’s real talk

I’ma burn blunts till this pain goes

And I’m on a hunt for the rainbow

I found out that there ain’t no pot of gold

You’ll see me end with my— *Gunshot*