The Village Square - Andrew Lloyd Webber, Carrie Hope Fletcher

The royal ball on Saturday

I must be the one he’ll choose

It’s a prizefight, win or lose

Preparing for the big soiree

We’ve had facelifts, we’ve had peels

Hope to God the blood congeals

Girls are storming each boutique

Haven’t eaten in a week

It’s him

Look at prince Sebastian, he’s so hot

Yesterday he was an afterthought

I would like to end up in his arms

How could I have missed his endless charms?

What a total dreamboat is this prince

Glad I did my hair and bought breath mints

Dying for a chance to be queen bee

Someone’s gonna bag him, why not me?

Hi Sebastian, oh, nice tights

Cinderella, hey

Did she just call him Sebastian?

No title?

The cheek!

Looks like you’ve become quite the hit with the ladies suddenly

You sure you still want me at the ball?

Your highness!

I’m sorry to interrupt your conversation with this, um, this

But you’re needed, urgently

I’d better go, it’s all gone a bit mad

I can see that

Hey

You want my advice, then back off, Cinderella

You better think twice, you’ll embarrass yourself

What?

Sebastian’s polite and too nice, Cinderella

You’re not in his league so get back on the shelf

Did he say this to you?

The prince is a sweetheart and too kind to say it

But you’re not his type, take a look at these girls

You’re kind of a dog, there’s no way to convey it

You’d best skip the ball, spend the night with the squirrels

Of course, how stupid of me

Cinderella!

This bracelet is too heavy for me to carry!

Cinderella, I need you, now!

Poor Cinderella, dull as a turnip

Cursed with a face that’s as plain as a boot