Back at Camp Granada (Hello Muddah Hello Faddah revisited) - Allan Sherman

Hello muddah, hello fadduh

I am back at Camp Grenada

And I’m writing you this letter

Just to say my compound fracture’s getting better

No one here knows where my trunk is

And my bunk is where the skunk is

And the food this year’s improving

All the little black things in it are not moving

Our camp nurse is quite a swimmer

She says swimming makes you slimmer

Her name’s Mrs. Pellagrini

Have you ever seen a whale in a bikini?

All the bathrooms have such thin doors

Gee I’d wish they’d move them indoors

We’re all tired of Mother Goose here

So next Friday night they’re having Lenny Bruce here

Let me stay, oh muddah, fadduh

Let me stay I love Grenada

Every night the campfire’s really keen

Oh ma please send some unguintine

Let me stay, out here in

Muddah nature’s land

And tiptoe through the tulips grand

To leave would be a shame

Besides, I’d miss the poker game

Please don’t worry, fadduh, muddah

I’ll take care of little brudduh

He plays ball here and he rows here

And I hope they teach him how to blow his nose here

He wakes up half past six hand

Goes directly to the quicksand

He was lonely, now he’s better

He’s like all of us except his bed is wetter